Only a few years after my high school conversion, I was dropped smack dab in a wonderful growing godly environment, ironically at a secular state college. It was through Campus Outreach that I began to learn how to read God’s Word, apply it to my life, pray, share Christ and grow. Mission trips and fellowship and discipleship opportunities abounded and I am forever grateful for both the ministry that group gives and what it gave me specifically.
It was through this group I met my first discipler. She was open, honest, and very gifted with the ability to know when to listen and when to speak. And when she spoke, her words were few but wise. And I’ve been hearing her voice in my head all week as I wrestle with some of those changes I see coming.
It’s hard sometimes to figure out what you should do. Yes, there are specific things biblically you know God has a definitive view on and there are many principles that can be applied to help know the will of God in a situation. But sometimes, after wading through your best guesses about the future, and the extent of your knowledge of God’s Word and godly counsel, you just have to make a choice. I remember my discipler telling me, years ago:
God’s will is not a tightrope. He gives you the tools and wisdom you need to make a decision and then sometimes leaves you to decide. If it’s not His will for you to do something, trust Him to close the door. As long as you are looking to Him, He will guide your steps.
This was, and still is, a freeing thought. To know that I can’t mess up His plans for my life, that even what I would call a bad choice, He has/can/will use it for His glory and purpose. His will for my life is not a narrow, tiny rope that I can tumble off of. It’s a path, a narrow road. I have to choose to leave it. And even in choosing to do so, I’m not outside His ability to control. If He can use Pharaoh of Egypt, Nebuchadnezzar, the jealous brothers of Joseph, and Judas of Iscariot to further His glory and purpose when they didn’t believe, then why would I think that He can’t guide my steps? And yet, sometimes, like now, I have to remind myself that. Both of my options look, to my eyes, as a possible godly choice. Neither is prohibited, both acceptable and could each in its way, grow me in different areas. Which to choose? I’m not sure. But I know His will isn’t a tightrope and He has me in safely in His hands.