The SuperMom Curse

I often feel like I have to be supermom since I’m a stay at home mom.  I mean, I don’t work outside the home, so what does my life count for without the career?  Obviously I must then be teacher, baker, chef, expert cleaner, the perfect judge in childhood affairs, household accountant and blogger.  This is what we hear when someone says Oh, you stay home?  What do you do all day?”  Now, I applaud and admire moms who can juggle work out of the home and the needs of family.  I was there for several years so I know that struggle of trying to make every second with your family count since work necessitated time and mind apart from them.  On either side of the work line, we all suffer from the SuperMom Curse.

This is the I have to do it all or it won’t get done right! curse.  It’s the one that causes us to sip our coffee at a gathering and compare ourselves to each other.  It’s what divides women instead of bringing them together.  It’s sinful, wrong, and in the end, plain hurtful to all involved.  Look at what Jethro says to Moses as he is trying to lead and care for the family of Israel:

Moses’ father-in-law said to him, “What you are doing is not good. You and the people with you will certainly wear yourselves out, for the thing is too heavy for you. You are not able to do it alone.
(Exodus 18:17-18 ESV)

If single leadership wasn’t a good thing for Moses, why do we think it is a good thing for us and our lives or families?  Are we engaging our spouses in the management of the home?  Because I know for my own husband, when I get all SuperMom on him he just backs away and leaves me to it.  I don’t blame him. But it’s not good.  Yes, he disciplines different than I. Sure, he makes dinner his way.  But when I exhaust myself on all the details I forget the blessings I have.  If I allow help, then there is energy left to enjoy and treasure the gifts of family, love and being home.  This extends out of my home too.  Am I gaining insight from other women?  Seeking help when I need it, not just sucking it up and saying well, it’s too much trouble to get help so I’ll do it all by myself?

Fight the supermom curse with the gospel of Christ.  We have grace to succeed, grace to fail.  We can rely on His strength, weigh the agendas and goals through the light of eternity and focus on how best to be effective.  A clean kitchen or freshly ironed clothes may not be the best outlet of resources that day.  And enlist the aid of the helps around you.  Because the thing is to too heavy for you.

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