It wasn’t until after I was married that I truly began to understand that marriage is a picture of the relationship the church has with Christ. I had read about it, but it wasn’t until I was actually a part of it did I realize how deeply a marriage can showcase the gospel…or showcase sinfulness.
No one else alive knows me like my husband. I have super close friends, I have a close family but no one else lives with me. My quirks. My sins. And all the consequences of them. Where family and friends can hug me, give me words of encouragement and pray for me…in then end I go home and it’s my spouse that is intimately acquainted with whatever happens next. I live life with him. It’s the same for my husband…I know him better than anyone. We support one another and pray for one another. We counsel, encourage and hold each other accountable.
But we sin, too. We can seek our own wants and desires and ignore one another. We can make things petty or sarcastic or hurtful. I can easily tear him down in a five-minute argument. I can criticize and push and back my husband into a corner and destroy the very God-given role of leader in my home.
Masculinity is tied to the role and responsibility that God has given to men. Masculinity is to serve as a reflection of the warrior role of our eternal Bridegroom. The denigration of masculinity mocks God’s purpose in creation and it mars the sacred metaphor of marriage.
Wagner, Kimberly (2012-08-24). Fierce Women: The Power of a Soft Warrior (p. 65). Moody Publishers. Kindle Edition.
When I try to steal away my husband’s authority, I’m stealing away the very thing that God created him to be. Is his leadership tainted by sin? Of course. My ability to submit is also tainted by sin. But I am to keep reminding myself that any robbing of his authority tears apart my ability to showcase the gospel in my marriage. How can I show the role of the Bride if I despise my Bridegroom?
God wants every marriage to be so characterized by unity, tender moments, lots of laughter, adventure, excitement and passion, humility and self-sacrifice, forgiveness and grace that when people see it, they can step back and say, “Oh, that’s what real love looks like. I get it.” And the real love they see going on between us, as husband and wife, is ultimately to point them to the love relationship between Christ and the church.
Wagner, Kimberly (2012-08-24). Fierce Women: The Power of a Soft Warrior (p. 66). Moody Publishers. Kindle Edition.