In this frantic-busy-cling-to-grace-and-forgiveness-or-give-it-up season of life, I’ve (re)learned some things. I thought to share them since most likely I will forget them in the next weeks and God will have to teach them to me all over again.
1) I know nothing. N-O-T-H-I-N-G. What I thought I knew about my kids, my faith, my heart, my work, my homeschooling…all of it has been a deck of cards shuffled. Personality conflicts (and sin) in the home, mood swings (and sin), learning style struggles (and sin), and completely out of my hands circumstances on a regular basis (and sin), has challenged every Biblical principle I hold dear. For we are but of yesterday and know nothing, for our days on earth are a shadow. (Job 8:9, ESV)
2) I am nothing. N-O-T-H-I-N-G. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. (1 Corinthians 13:2, ESV) Love (God’s love) is life. I have done everything I possibly could to squelch the love of God in my heart and towards others with my pet sins and pet idols, instead of allowing Him to love others through me.
3) I can do nothing. N-O-T-H-I-N-G. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.(John 15:5, ESV) All that I thought I accomplished on my own strength has withered and died. That which has been Spirit-led has remained. Unfortunately, it’s far less than what I thought. It is most disheartening to realize after many weeks of effort, bad motives have robbed all eternal value from it.
4) He is everything. E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him. And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together. (Colossians 1:16-17, ESV) When I forget (intellectually or functionally) who it is all for…plans, errands, work, family, myself, my time, even my kids!…I place an idol on His throne. He is first…and He holds it together.
5) He alone is my peace. They shall return and dwell beneath my shadow; they shall flourish like the grain; they shall blossom like the vine; their fame shall be like the wine of Lebanon. (Hosea 14:7, ESV) No matter how far I stray, I can return to the safety and provision of the Lord. It’s not wealth or glory He promises, but a home in Him, growth, fruit and a good name.
My mind, heart and practical life are still a whirlwind needing to settle, but these things have been painfully learned (or relearned) in this season of life. I’m sure I will relearn them again. And again. Lord grant that I may always return to dwell beneath His shadow.